Through these differences, we finally see each other. I have a unique disposition, in that, I give back what others give me. May it be conversationally, energetically, emotionally, or whole-heartedly. I rarely do it consciously but am aware it creates rapport, comfort,and ease. I am aware of my body language, vocabulary, spiritual references, context, place, everything and I tailor myself to them. Is it to please others, more to appease them and cut out any conceivable blocks to communication and connection that may exist.

I was recently told I have an amazing game face or mask. And that it wasn’t until weeks later that this person actually saw me, they had their own blocks and problems but all guards leave their post eventually and we were able to see one another as is.

I try to be authentic, but if someone greets me with a facade I give it back to them. I give them what they are most comfortable with. I have tried being real/authentic with these people but they aren’t all there… So even when I am they seem slippery like these truths roll right through them, off to the side, and under. It’s a confounding thing to watch. There eyes are blank, no understanding or comprehension. Like there is a well there but the cover is on so only last nights rain sits on top giving the illusion of depth, but you could not put a bucket in and draw up anything from the reservoir.

In a conversation I had recently, it came to light that certain interactions might be doomed to fail with the very first step, by not being open and truthful. By responding in kind to the other person consistently by being closed off and therefore hiding ourselves the other person who is depthless has perhaps learned this habit from us, from the past when we were unable to connect. Perhaps they grew tired of being rebuffed this connection with us and in defense closed off more completely. Like we did them.

So now our only course of action, is to meet in the middle. To open back up, to take the chance to attempt to share, to be present even in their absence. And maybe call them back into the deep from the surface. I would want someone to do that for me.

The best water is only a potentiality for refreshment as long as it is not brought up. So too with leaders of man kind: it is all important that one should drink from the spring of their words and translate them into life.

My reading from The I Ching